Episode 248
Title: Why you are so F*in tired?
Host: Dr. Nicole Rivera
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Transcription:
Hello, everyone. Welcome back to another episode of Integrative You Radio. Dr. Nicole here, rolling solo for the third time in a row, and today, I’m here to talk about why you're so freaking tired. Let’s just start there.
I was thinking about this a lot recently. For those of you who don’t know, Dr. Nick, our son, and I moved to Italy recently, and when we got here, holy crap, I was so tired—barely functioning kind of tired. I thought, "What is this? Is this jet lag? Will this go away?" Even though I have a lot of tools, I was in a different mindset, wondering, "What is this feedback? What is my body trying to tell me?"
This is something I bring up a lot with my clients. They often tell me about their pain or symptoms, whether it’s lightheadedness after starting supplements, or gut distress after trying a therapy. I always ask them, "What is your body processing? What feedback is it giving you?" Not everything uncomfortable is bad. Sometimes your body is just working through something—something that’s been holding you back mentally, emotionally, or physically—and it needs to process that to release it.
So, I always ask: What is your body telling you? What is the feedback from what you’re experiencing? If it’s something physical or biochemical, we troubleshoot it. But, within 24 hours, some clients realize, "I’ve been relinquishing control over something," or, "I’ve made peace with the idea that my job is no longer serving me." And within 24 to 48 hours, their symptoms, whether it’s ringing in their ears, a stuffy nose, or gut distress, often dissipate.
Now, let’s get real. If you’re really tired, it's probably because you're doing things you don’t want to do. We’ve all been programmed to think that’s just life. We keep doing stuff we don’t want to do, and the feedback will keep coming until you learn the lesson and make a change.
For me, when we moved here, it wasn’t that I wasn’t serving myself—it was that I was processing all the times I didn’t serve myself. All the times I lived to serve others. I took care of everyone but me. I had an entire month where I felt like I was hit by a bus. Instead of asking, "What’s wrong with me?" I realized it was a phase of processing and integration. I made a change, took a leap, and aligned my life with my values. But my body still needed time to release the energy that had been stuck in every part of it. And that process took a month.
If you’re someone who’s living in chronic fatigue, you really need to start asking, "What is this?" Yes, it could be biochemical—your liver could be overloaded with toxins, or your blood sugar could be unstable because you're skipping breakfast or relying on coffee all day. That will make you tired. Hormonal imbalances, liver and pancreas issues, clogged lymphatics—all of these contribute to fatigue.
But, on top of that, you’re probably saying yes to things that don’t serve you. You bite your tongue, feel guilty, and regret agreeing to stuff. Guilt is the lowest vibration emotion—it drains your energy. You serve others more than you serve yourself and are unclear on your own values, which leads you to say yes when you should be saying no.
For the person who says, "I love helping people"—great! But if there’s an imbalance, where you’re giving more than you receive or doing things that don’t align with your values, it drains you.
This all ties back to your values. Knowing your values acts as a compass for decision-making. It guides you on where to say yes and where to say no. When I first started identifying my values, leadership and teaching were clear for me—I loved leading people to become better versions of themselves and teaching others. These were things I could do for free, and they energized me. But I struggled to define my other values, which left me feeling tired and unfulfilled, despite having a "good life" on paper.
Eventually, I realized two more of my values: fun-loving spirit and expansive adventure. I needed laughter and adventure to thrive, but work had taken over my life. I wasn’t laughing with friends or enjoying adventures like I used to. Life had become too serious.
So, if you don’t know what you’d do every day if you didn’t need to earn a living, that’s probably why you’re tired. Most people don’t know their values, and they end up drained because they’re living out of alignment with them.
We also see this pattern in older generations. People work their whole lives, retire, and then die soon after because they don’t know what brings them joy outside of work. They don’t know how to enjoy life because they spent decades in a 9-to-5 cycle. Understanding your values and helping your kids do the same is crucial for living a fulfilling, energized life.
If you’re hitting the snooze button every morning, it’s just feedback telling you to make a change. Yes, it’s uncomfortable, but necessary. I closed my business of 11 years and moved because I had a baby and realized I wasn’t living in alignment with my values. It was hard, but I knew I had to make that change.
Everyone will tell you you're crazy when you decide to quit your job, move, or make a bold decision, but if you know your values, you’ll feel more confident in your choices. Staying stuck is scarier than taking a risk. Bold decisions often lead to fulfillment and energy you didn’t even know was possible.
So, remember, understanding your values and making values-based decisions is the first step to improving your quality of life, regaining your energy, and expanding beyond what you ever thought was possible.
